I have always assumed that “everybody thinks like me.” As a teacher I assumed the same from my students and their parents. Often I was disappointed.
I think that family and friends are probably “closer” to thinking the same if only because family is so close and friends are chosen for that reason.
But even then one grows differently than ones family and grows apart from one's friends.
I think that there is some benefit in this type of thinking. It evens the playing field. You are not better then anyone else and you are not worse then anyone!
Then it turns out that if they are "worse" than you are it brings them up higher and if they are "better" you have room to learn and improve. Of course the terms "worse" and "better" are subject to definition and interpretation.
As I have aged I see that while for the most part my approach has been a good one, it can also cause confusion, frustration, missed or inappropriate expectations.
So now I start with the high expectations for others which I hold for myself but temper them, hopefully non-judgementally if they fall short … or fall differently.
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- It is very difficult to understand what anybody else's experience is. There aren't enough words to really understand what anybody else is living. Physical beings want things to be the same. They want people to think the same. You work rather hard at sameness, but you will never win that battle because, from Nonphysical, diversity is known to be the most beneficial part of the game.
- Excerpted from: Maui, HI on December 14, 1997