Showing posts with label Language. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Language. Show all posts

Sunday, April 7, 2019

The Conversation Continues

Lynda replies to Kate's post:

A bit like “meaningful activities”? O dear…


To me, “therapy” connotes an intervention (usually led by a professional) with a healing purpose. Pilates is therapy for me, physically, for example, whereas dancing is simply something I love doing. Perhaps there’s a monetary element too: Pilates costs, as there’s a professional & equipment involved, whereas dancing is free. I pay for “therapy”.


I’ve often wondered about “activities” too. I’m pretty sure that term stems from “activities coordinator” job roles & “activities of daily living” (ADLs) but there’s a concept of “filling in time” that doesn’t sit comfortably with me.


It took me quite a long time to understand that just “being” is often enough for the person I love who is living with dementia. Yet I also know how hard it is for her to initiate anything, that she can end up bored, unstimulated, even agitated if nothing happens around her. So do I “engage” her in “activities”? Nope. The reason is that if I lead, say if I pull out some art stuff & suggest she do some drawing (which used to be one of her passions) she’ll look at me as if I’m some stupid teacher! She’ll see right through my intent, i.e. to “keep her busy”.

 
But if I’m cooking & she comes over to have a look, she may end up doing something with me…that’s living, it’s not an “activity” because there is no expectation of her.


I think it’s the power dynamic that defines who is doing what, to or for someone. Living is being with. Therapy is doing to and for. I’ll just scrap the term “activities” entirely – it’s demeaning.



My reply:

WELL SAID Lynda. I think you hit it on the head with therapy is ... "the power dynamic that defines who is doing what, to or for someone. Living is being with. Therapy is doing to and for." 


I believe that doesn't and shouldn't make the use of the words THERAPY or ACTIVITY incorrect or distasteful. As I commented to Kate, if we look at DEMENTIA as a DISABILITY, and if we agree that it is a RIGHT for people living with Dementia to be provided support which remediates accomodates LIFE SKILLS, then helping to provide alternate and corrective skills does seem to become THERAPY, especially when in a facility by trained personnel.


At home. I agree helping you cook ... is just life. At home with a loving partner, cooking is therapeutic, fun, interesting, engaging but it is in reality is just "cooking," no aditional label needed. 

At the memory care facility, cooking experiences on Tuesdays from 1:00-3:00 might well be called an activity. If specially trained people were involved in helping a person develop new skills in cooking which were safer and which met their ability level, wouldn't that be therapy?


“The difference between the right word and the almost-right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.”
— Mark Twain


Am I being picky about language use? Maybe. But I am afraid that if we begin to think that never using words like THERAPY or MEANINGFUL ACTIVITY will help, we might be wrong by not looking at the finer points of Dementia Care and the really necessary changes like adequate support from doctors, better training of caregivers (home and institutional,) other changes in use of hurtful language, more funding of not only research in disease cure but also in best practice care giving. 


Also, many of these problems we are trying to address also apply to seniors in need with or without the diagnosis of Dementia. My problem is I always try to work with perspective: gray vs black and white. That makes me wordy!

Just to reveiw, the following links take a closer look at guidelines for Dementia language use.

"Respectful Disability Language: Here’s What’s Up!" (By Kids As Self Advocates (KASA) is a project created by youth with disabilities for youth. Kind of like 'Out of the mouths of children!" 
http://www.aucd.org/docs/add/sa_summits/Language%20Doc.pdf (opens in a new window.)

National Disability Union in Ireland: 
http://nda.ie/Publications/Attitudes/Appropriate-Terms-to-Use-about-Disability/ (opens in a new window.)

United States American Disabilities Act: Guidelines for writing about people with disabiities:
https://adata.org/factsheet/ADANN-writing (opens in a new window.)


Finally, Dementia Language Use guidelines from Austrailia: 
https://www.dementia.org.au/files/resources/dementia-language-guidelines.pdf (opens in a new window.)


Sunday, January 10, 2016

Ten Tips

From my friend Susan: Ten excellent things to remember when dealing with someone who has memory loss problems be it old age, Dementia, or Alzheimer's!

http://myalzheimersstory.com/2016/01/10/10-things-to-remember-when-you-interact-with-people-who-forget/#respond

Sunday, December 30, 2012

A New Vocabulary

(Gigi on bottom, Emma on top)

As you know, two new kitties have joined Gregory and my life. They really are gifts of love, and purr, and mischief, and more love. As they have gotten used to living with us, we have gotten used to living with them, a new vocabulary has begun to develop:

"Watch out for those land mines."

Meaning, don't trip on all the cat toys strewn around every part of the condo.

"What crazy women."

Meaning, they talk in very loud voices. Our previous pets only used that level of talking when they were in pain or unhappy. We have had to readjust our thinking and as a prompt to do so, it was just easier to label them as "Crazy" when they were behaving like that.

"Freedom girls, FREEDOM."

Meaning, I am walking towards the guest bathroom, where you are being held captive while we were gone, and I want you to know I am about to release you, so you don't start screaming when you hear us come in, and then think that I'll let you out every time you scream, and being an intermittent behavior you will inadvertently sustain more screaming for longer while I keep you locked up.

"TREATS, TREATS, TREATS," said in a high falsetto voice while shaking the kitty treat jar.

Meaning, I am going to give you some treats, knowing that you will follow me into the bathroom even though you know you'll be locked up - or - that you'll come out of the closet even though you know I'll close the door behind you.

"CHICKEN."

Meaning it is time for your moist food feeding. Our previous cat, Mariah, only liked chicken and snubbed her nose at turkey, fish, or ham. So to get her to come to eat, may she rest in peace, I announced "Chicken!"

"Loving, nurturing noises."

I realized when I am holding a kitty in my arms, and she is purring, and I am rubbing my nose in her face or belly (known as schnuggling in Yiddish,) I MAKE THE SAME SOUNDS MY MOTHER USED TO MAKE WHEN SHE WAS SCHNUGGLING ME!


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