This poem was written June of 2015. Do not remember if I posted it or not. Things are not quite as difficult as in the poem but the loneliness, sadness, and missing him will always continue. I learn to live with it a little easier.
The key in the door turns
The memories are silent
Hiding, least they evoke
Over the threshold, I step
Into the waiting abyss
The house filled to overflowing
With every last encounter.
Into the front hall closet
Onto the waiting hanger
I place my jacket gingerly
With others no longer owned.
Walking past the lonely bedroom
Into the front of the condo
Shelved and collected and scattered
With mementos, memorabilia, reminders.
In my arms, two grocery bags
Filled with individual items
Then emptied into the cabinets
And refrigerator, food for one.
Dinner from the microwave
Emptied on a tray and taken
Into the TV room TV table
For flickering eating friendships.
The cats, two of them purring
Bringing life and joy easily
Without expectations to be filled
Joy on the shoulders of sorrow.
Then bedtime with the wrinkled sheets
Only my scent on my pillows
Now the memories no longer silent
Keeping the night long yet loving.